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OnCurb Your Enthusiasm, comedian J.B. Smoove plays Leon Black, the brother of Loretta Black, a woman who ends up moving in with Larry David in Los Angeles after being displaced from New Orleans by a hurricane. Despite already having a home in L.A. not to mention not even being formally invited into Larrys house Leon moves in, and quickly becomes a key player in Larrys antics. When Loretta finally moves out, Larry gestures to Leon, I guess this means youll be obviously meaning to ask him to leave as well. When Leon quickly replies that hell be Going upstairs to eat this f****** Chinese food, pausing to take a sip of soda, in my f****** room, Larry cant even muster the energy to debate the point.

Leon is the textbook definition of what Ive come to call the semi-welcome guest. A person who, although you dont necessarily want them in your home, is entertaining enough that youre willing to put aside your reservations about his or her presence for what you hope will be a brief period of time. Leon is profane, selfish and obnoxious. Hes also hilarious and, more often than not, unexpectedly a boon to Larry.

As luck would have it, I ended up interlocked with semi-welcome guests of my own last weekend. When a buddy of mine in Jacksonville asked if he and an unspecified number of his friends could stay with me for a night while they were in town for a concert one that I had not planned on attending I had a few concerns.

For one: He, as well as his posse, are punks. Im not using that word in a condescending sense either. The first time we hung out, he was selling records and promoting his self-published zine at an abandoned warehouse for an impromptu punk show. He was also the first person I ever moshed with.

Second, having witnessed it firsthand, I know the level of belligerence and destruction hes capable of when sauced. The idea of having a whole horde of people like him in my house made my blood run cold.

Third, and perhaps a tad bit pejoratively, I live with fraternity dudes. Punks and fraternity dudes are like Ann Coulter and critical thinking they just dont go together.

Against my better judgment and because I love him, I agreed to let him and his homies crash at my place. When I asked him how many people would be staying, the following text conversation ensued. Names are changed to protect the innocent.

How many people/who

Just like 3. Derek, Jack, maybe this chick Alexis. And Bri. Robbie.

Thats 5. 6 total, actually. Yeah. Jesus.

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Dont kick out those semi-welcome guests