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Yep, thats me. Youre probably wondering how I got here.Alex Wong/Getty Images

Hello, America! I am the housefly that perched atop Mike Pences head for two solid minutes during Wednesday nights vice presidential debate, and Id like to talk to you about the future of this great nation. Like some of you, I was undecided when I began watching the debate, because, as with some of you, my brain is the size of a poppyseed. But when I heard Mike Pence outline the Trump administrations plans, I knew there was only one ticket I could trust to protect me and the 150 or so eggs I laid in the vice presidents hair. Today I am thrilled to wholeheartedly endorse Donald J. Trump for president.

You may be confused as to why I am offering an endorsement in the first place, since most Americans share molecular physicist Seth Brundles pernicious misconception that insects dont have politics. Its true that were not big on compromise, but its also true that we love garbage, and we love corpses, and we love shit, and you dont have to have one of those big ugly mammalian brains to tell which political party is committed to materially improving our lives. No president in my life cyclewhich began two weeks ago, when I was a maggot happily gnawing my way through a rotten Egg McMuffin in a dumpster behind Kingsbury Hallhas done more to roll back environmental regulations, ensuring that my family and I have a constant supply of garbage where we can live, laugh, and love. No president in my life cycle has provided more dead Americans for us to eat, working tirelessly to overwhelm hospitals and morgues, presumably for our benefit. And no administration in history, never mind my life cycle, has been as dedicated to shit in all its formsbullshit, horseshit, and of course the literal shit that inevitably accompanies a diet of fast food and Diet Cokepumping it into the airwaves, the sewers, and the skulls of their supporters. Theres just no question which administration will do more to help me feed my family.

This election goes beyond mere material concerns, however; theres also a spiritual dimension. And for faith-based voters like me, the Trump administration is the only option. Like all flies, I worship Beelzebub, the Lord of the Flies, the Prince of Demons, the Archfiend of Lies and Death and Decay, and my faith is very important to me. When I heard Mike Pence speak so movingly of his faithhis faith in Donald Trump, primarilyI knew which administration I could trust to build Our Dark Lords Throne of Lies right here on earth. Kamala Harris did her best to dissemble at a few points, and maybe it worked on television, but take it from a fly in the studio audience: You could smell the evil radiating from Mike Pence. In fact, I was originally only planning on briefly alighting on the vice presidents head, running my ovipositor through his gorgeous strands of snowy white hair, dropping a clutch of eggs, and going on my merry way. But the second the setae on my footpads touched that wiry surface, I sensed a kindred intelligence coldly whirring and clicking away just under Pences skull, and I knew it was time for me to make my first political endorsement.

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My endorsement of a Republican candidate may be surprising to those who remember my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandmothers endorsement of Hillary Clinton back in 2016, which famously caused Alex Jones to speculate that Clinton and Barack Obama were both demons:

The explanation here is simple, and its a treasured story my family has passed down to our larvae for 48 generations: We were pranking Alex Jones because he sucks. Land in the right place at the right time, and you can get that dude to believe pretty much anything. I know that humans are bad at detecting a wryly cocked proboscis, but you hardly needed compound eyes to see that Hillary Clinton was just a run-of-the-mill Democrat, not some kind of hellbeast of decay practically rubbing her hands together with glee at the thought of stacking the lies and the garbage and the bodies so high that mankinds rotten civilization finally collapses and the Age of the Fly can begin.

The 2020 election is different, however. I have listened closely to Mike Pences plans and policies. I have carefully smelled his hair. I have laid hundreds of eggs in his scalp. And this November, I am confident that there is only one ticket that can ensure a happy, healthy, and extremely well-fed future for my larvae. I urge all humans to cast your votes for Donald Trump and Michael Pence. They might not literally be insects, but theyre the closest thing weve got. Besides, the other guy is trying to kill me:

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Continued here:
I Am the Fly That Landed in Mike Pences Hair. Heres Why Im Supporting Donald Trump. - Slate

The New York Times dutifully reported:

Vice President Mike Pence, his hair perfectly coiffed, never reacted to the flys appearance on the right side of his head. It stood out against his bright white hair, standing still for the most part but moving around slightly before, well, flying away.

A local TV news reporter from Californiaclocked the flys screen time on Mr. Pences headat 2 minutes, 3 seconds.

Despite the buzz that it created, the fly did not respond to an interview request. However, Americas most famous insect did start a viral social media account.

Please dont whack me with a fly swatter, but that spiritual ramifications title at the top of this weeks column was clickbait.

If that bugs you, though, Sojourners Jenna Barnett has you covered with 5 Bible verses about flies. See, theres always a religion angle. Even with Flygate.

Concerning the actual debate, Pence and California Sen. Kamala Harris clashed briefly over religious belief. Religion Unpluggeds Timothy Nerozzi delves into the specifics.

Before we proceed, lets end this portion of Weekend Plug-in with an appropriate hymn.

See the article here:
What spiritual ramifications of the fly that landed on Mike Pence's head? - GetReligion

CLEVELAND, Ohio The moment a fly landed on Mike Pences head during Wednesdays vice-presidential debate is being immortalized with a bobblehead.

You might say the buzz hadnt died down from the debate when the folks at the National Bobblehead Hall of Fame and Museum issued the news.

Pre-orders are available for the Mike Pence fly bobblehead, which costs $25. The bobblehead includes the fly on Pences head, a plexiglass-like barrier and a removable mini swatter. Shipping is expected in January.

The fly landed - and stayed on Pences head for a couple of minutes as he debated Sen. Kamala Harris in Salt Lake City.

While bobbleheads gained fame for depicting moments mostly in sports, this year has expanded the reach of the Milwaukee-based hall.

Multiple bobbleheads have been issued in the likeness of Dr. Anthony Fauci including one that became the top-selling one ever plus others showing governors, essential workers and sign-language interpreters. Donations of sales from several of the bobbleheads have been earmarked for the Protect The Heroes fund in support of the 100 Million Mask Challenge for healthcare workers.

There are just too many good opportunities to turn into bobbleheads these days, said the halls co-founder Phil Sklar.

Recent bobblehead coverage

Dr. Anthony Fauci bobblehead is announced

How much did the best-selling bobblehead of Dr. Anthony Fauci raise?

Gov. Mike DeWine now has his own bobblehead

Dr. Amy Acton bobblehead to be released

Whats Marla Berkowitz bobblehead signing?

Dozens of bobbleheads issued for front-line workers in coronavirus fight

Cleveland Indians Hot Dog Derby bobbleheads are released (short video)

President Trump, Joe Biden, Kanye West bobbleheads issued

2 new Fauci bobbleheads are in the works

Multiple Baker Mayfield bobbleheads on the market (poll)

I am on cleveland.coms life and culture team and cover food, beer, wine and sports-related topics. If you want to see my stories, heres a directory on cleveland.com. Bill Wills of WTAM-1100 and I talk food and drink usually at 8:20 a.m. Thursday morning. And tune in at 8:05 a.m. Fridays for Beer with Bona and Much, Much More with Munch Bishop on 1350-AM The Gambler.

See more here:
Mike Pence fly bobblehead set to be released - cleveland.com

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No, Mike Pence Didn't Have Pink EyeBut Here Are 12 Causes of Red Eyes You Should Know Abo - WFSB

Vice President Mike Pence at the 2020 vice presidential campaign debate in Salt Lake City, Utah, October 7, 2020.(Justin Sullivan/Pool via Reuters)

On Wednesday morning, I wrote a pre-debate primer about how the vice-presidential debate would be Mike Pences final audition for the 2024 GOP primary. He aced that audition, and very well could become president one day.

I havent approved well, no Ive been disgusted by the sycophancy that he has exhibited since being selected as Donald Trumps running mate in 2016. And Ive never thought him a particularly charismatic figure either; But that doesnt mean hes not talented. On the debate stage with Kamala Harris, Pence left no doubt about his own aspirations and abilities.

Pences capacity to respectfully and convincingly weave stories into a coherent articulation of the merits of his own worldview and the problems with his political opponents is undeniable. On coronavirus, Pence held his own and rightfully pointed out that the Biden campaign is without novel ideas to address it. On every other subject, he embarrassed the California senator on both substance and style. Without apology, he defended the pro-life position. Without reservation, he explained why the strike that eliminated Qasem Soleimani was not only justified, but vital to U.S. interests. The whole evening was a reminder of just how appealing the conservative agenda can be when its not packaged within Donald Trump.

In 2024, Mike Pence has a case for being that package.

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Mike Pence Aces the Audition - National Review