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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)Commenting on Donald Trumps first hundred days in office, Vice-President Mike Pence told Fox News on Sunday, To tell you the truth, I really thought Id be President by now.

When I agreed to run on the ticket with him, I said to myself, Mike, after hes been in the White House for a few weeks, hell be a total train wreck and youll be able to slide into the big-boy chair, Pence said. I never in a million years thought hed last a hundred days. My best guess was thirty.

The former Indiana governor said that, with such seemingly fatal missteps as Trumps failed health-care plan and travel bans, as well as any number of unhinged outbursts, It feels like Ive come close to getting in there maybe ten or twelve times. But close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.

Calling the past hundred days the longest hundred days of my life, Pence said that he has no choice now but to sit and wait for my moment.

Im a man of faith, and I believe that the Lord has a plan for me, he said. But if another hundred days come and go and Im still not President, you are going to see one pissed-off Mike Pence.

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Pence Really Thought He'd Be President by Now - The New Yorker (satire)

President Donald Trumps recent reversal on his prior criticisms of NATO was not a reversal, Vice President Mike Pence argued on Sunday, falsely claiming that Trump successfully forced the alliance to change.

He didnt change on NATO, Pence said on NBCs Meet the Press. NATO changed.

During his campaign, Trump called the alliance obsolete, but as president, hechanged his tune. Yet Pence insisted it was Trump who convinced NATO to shift its priorities.

I mean on the international scene, heres a president whos said that NATO had to change, that our NATO allies had to begin to step up to begin to share the burden of the cost of our common defense. And they are, Pence said. Theyre also changing the mission of NATO to focus more on terrorism.

Pences claim resembled a similar suggestion by White House press secretary Sean Spicer, who attributed Trumps reversal to the world shifting toward Trumps position, rather than the other way around.

If you look at whats happened, its those entities or individuals in some cases or issues evolving toward the presidents position, Spicer said earlier this month. NATO is moving toward what he has been calling for.

When host Chuck Todd mentioned to Pence that NATO and its priorities have been evolving for years, under multiple U.S. presidents, not simply as a result of Trump, Pence blamed the gale-force wind of the establishment here in Washington, D.C. and the media for not focusing on the presidents relentless effort to keep his promises to the American people.

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Mike Pence Claims Trump Didn't Change His Stance On NATO Rather, NATO Changed - Huffington Post

Vice President Mike Pence wants U.S. allies to "do more" when it comes to threats posed by North Korea.

"The president has been very clear, whether it's our allies in Europe or South Korea, or Japan, or other countries, that we expect countries around the world to do more, whether it's this missile defense system, or other systems," Pence said. The vice president recently returned from a trip to the region, which included a visit to the demilitarized zone between North and South Korea.

Pence was asked Sunday on NBC's "Meet the Press" about reports that national security adviser H.R. McMaster is reassuring ally South Korea that the U.S. will pay for a proposed missile defense system for that country.

The program's host, Chuck Todd, said "President Trump said South Korea would pay for the system. How do you square this?"

Pence came back by defining what U.S. policy is for the region, and the need for allies in the region, and elsewhere, to be equal partners with the United States in dealing with threats. He reassured South Korea that they should know that "America will be there to defend them, even as they defend themselves."

McMaster later said a report from Reuters mischaracterized his comments about the U.S.-South Korea deal on missile defense. During an interview on "Fox News Sunday," he said the U.S. is looking to renegotiate with South Korea, but will honor the current deal in the meantime.

Todd said in response to Pence, "at minimum, we're not going to argue over the bill now, is what you're saying."

Pence came back saying the administration has been "very clear" that America's prosperous allies must "do more in their own defense."

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Mike Pence: South Korea must 'do more' to secure itself from regional threats - Washington Examiner

Vice President Mike Pence is a very special man. He considers his face both a tool of diplomacy and a weapon of intimidation. He doesnt consort with random harlots. And he calls his wife, Karen, mother often.But Pence has another special attribute: He resembles more fictional characters than Ive ever seen and theyre all veterans. Though Pence never served, he sure looks like a lot of people who did, sort of!

Before he was the veteran bodyguard to Dr. Benton Quest (and his titular son Johnny), Race Bannon was Roger Tiberius Bannon, born in 1932 in Wilmette, Illinois. In 1951, he lied about his age to join the Navy, serving four years as a SEAL. Yes, this is all canon, and the resemblance that Pence bears to the swaggering action man has been well documented.

Murphy, inspired by Bannon, has an unclear association with the U.S. armed forces, as does everything else in the two series. But bonus points: Voice actor John Stephenson, the throat behind Murphys distinctive rasp, was a gunner and radio operator in the Air Force in World War II.

The caustic and obscene father of Hank Hill claimed to have killed fitty men in the Pacific theater during World War II, and he spent the entire series regaling everyone who would listen about losing his shins to a Japanese machine gun:

I was 14, just a little older than Bobby. But I knew Uncle Sam needed me, so I lied and signed up. We had beat the Nazzys in Italy, and they shipped me to the Pacific theater. A Tojo torpedo sent our troop ship to the bottom. I could only save three of my buddies: Fatty, Stinky, and Brooklyn. Out of the sun came a Tojo Zero and put fitty bullets in my back. The blood attracted sharks. I had to give em Fatty. Then things took a turn for the worse. I made it to an island, but it was full of Tojos! They were spitting on the U.S. flag! So I rushed em, but it was a trap. They opened fire and blew my shins off. Last thing I remember, I beat em all to death with a big piece of Fatty. I woke up in a field hospital, and they were sewing my feet to my knees.

Hill was awarded the Medal of Honor, Purple Heart, and American Campaign Medal for his valor.

The resemblance is uncanny, even if the fictional Dukes, uh, biographyis ridiculously detailed:

Duke is the code name of First Sergeant Conrad S. Hauser, and was born in St. Louis, Missouri. He is a skilled polyglot, being fluent in English, French and German, as well as several Southeast Asian languages. He was at the top of his class at Fort Benning, attended U.S. Army Special Language school, has undergone Special Forces training, and worked with South Vietnamese tribesmen. He was also an instructor in four different Special Forces schools. Despite his accomplishments, he has repeatedly turned down any officer commissions offered to him. He believes a commanders place is with his troops, not behind the battle lines.

If were being honest. Duke is a way cooler nickname than Pences Hoosier.

Few people know that the legendary funnyman joined the Royal Canadian Air Force after he was 17, but everyone knows that the Canadian military isnt real, which, when taken with his cartoonish character, relegates his veteran status to imaginary.

Sorry, Leslie looks like youll have to just wish us luck:

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Mike Pence Resembles A Scary Number Of Fictional Cartoon Veterans - Task & Purpose

Vice President Mike Pence on Sunday said that hehopesCongress willhave a health care bill on President Donald Trumpsdesk by the end of the year, a far cry from Republicans original push to pass legislation within hisnow-elapsedfirst 100 days.

Were hopeful therell be action in the House of Representatives soon, Pence said in an interview on NBC News Meet the Press.I think health care reform, repealing and replacing Obamacare, is just around the corner.

How do you pass this thing? Chuck Todd asked.

First, before I get to that, lets begin with the fact that Obamacare has failed, Pence deflected. I mean, it literally is collapsing all across the country.

That is a very debatable point, Mr. Vice President, Todd replied.

Pence moved on to discussing congressional Republicans first attempt to pass a repeal bill, which leaders pulled aftertheywere unable to corral enough votes to get the billthrough the House.

Congress obviously wasnt ready to begin the process of repealing Obamacare a little more than a month ago, but I think were close, he said.

Before the end of the year? Todd asked. Not making that promise?

I hope before the end of the year, Pence replied.

Trump on Sunday tweeted thata new billto repeal and replace Obamacare is on its way, but alsodid not specify when.

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Pence: 'I Hope' GOP Will Move Forward On Obamacare Repeal By End Of Year - TPM