Archive for the ‘Mike Pence’ Category

Hiltzik: For Republicans, ESG is the new critical race theory – Los Angeles Times

In May, Elon Musk went on the warpath against the investment model known by the initials ESG, short for environmental, social and governance principles.

ESG is a scam, Musk, the chief executive of electric-car maker Tesla, groused in a tweet. It has been weaponized by phony social justice warriors.

Musk was irked that Tesla had been dropped from a Standard & Poors ESG index while oil company Exxon Mobil remained. But his complaint tied in neatly with a campaign being waged by political conservatives against ESG, or, as they sometimes describe it, woke capitalism.

Climate risk is investment risk.

BlackRock CEO Larry Fink, 2020

Red states have been implementing policies aimed at taking business away from investment managers whose strategies ostensibly promote environmental goals or social activism say, by shunning investments in fossil fuel or firearms companies or in companies with questionable social practices.

Former Vice President Mike Pence placed the battle against ESG front and center in his quest for the GOP presidential nomination in 2024. During a speech in Houston in May, Pence attacked the Biden administration for advancing capricious new ESG regulations that allow left-wing radicals to destroy American energy producers from within.

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Pences words surely fell on welcoming ears in Houston, since ESG investing commonly targets the oil and gas industry and the fossil fuel economy. For example, the American Legislative Exchange Council, a right-wing organization partly funded by the Koch network, which derives much of its wealth from fossil fuels, has promoted a model anti-ESG law.

A Texas law passed last year prohibits state agencies from investing or doing business with financial firms deemed to boycott fossil fuel companies by taking any action ... intended to penalize, inflict economic harm on, or limit commercial relations with those companies.

Texas State Comptroller Glenn Hegar has already begun compiling a list of boycotting firms by asking them to disclose their policies on global warming.

In June, West Virginia State Treasurer Riley Moore informed six leading Wall Street firms by letter that they had been provisionally found to be boycotting fossil fuel companies, possibly making them ineligible for state contracts. The firms are BlackRock, Goldman Sachs, JPMorgan Chase, Wells Fargo, U.S. Bancorp and Morgan Stanley.

Goldman Sachs and U.S. Bancorp declined my request for comment. BlackRock hasnt commented publicly. JPMorgan told me it hasnt yet responded to Moore; the deadline for responding is July 10. The other two didnt reply.

BlackRock, one of the worlds largest investment management firms, has become a particular target for the anti-ESG crowd. In part thats because BlackRock CEO Larry Fink sounded an early alarm about the investment impact of global warming in his annual letter to corporate CEOs in 2020. Climate risk is investment risk, Fink wrote then.

This year, Fink noted that every company and every industry will be transformed by the transition to a net zero world (that is, reducing the emission of greenhouse gases to zero). He added, The question is, will you lead, or will you be led?

In response, West Virginias Moore announced that his state would withdraw about $20 million in funds from BlackRock management, out of its $8 billion in Treasury investments. BlackRock also manages about $8 billion for the states pension fund, which isnt subject to the treasurers action.

Still, the pushback by states doesnt precisely match the weight of the oil and gas industry within their borders.

You dont see legislation penalizing banks or investment funds for shunning oil and gas companies coming out of blue California, which ranks second in the nation in most measures of oil and gas economic activity, according to the American Petroleum Institute, or Pennsylvania (third to fifth, depending on the metric), or other top-10 states such as New York, New Jersey and Illinois.

You see them in red states such as Texas, Kentucky and Tennessee. Texas ranks first in the nation in oil and gas activity, but the other two arent even among the top 15.

In Tennessee, which enacted a law forbidding the state treasurer to do business with a financial institution that refuses to finance companies in the fossil fuel industry, the oil and gas industry accounts for about 4% of employment in the state.

Thats a sign that ESG has become an all-purpose rallying cry in the partisan culture wars. For Republicans and the right wing, ESG is the new critical race theory. Its a concept nebulous enough to be made to seem offensive or evil.

The term itself can be weaponized as a catchphrase to rile up the base; insofar as the base has no idea what it even means, so much the better. (Not even the most hidebound anti-CRT flag-carriers can explain what CRT is.)

Its worth noting that state-level attacks on financial companies over their purported favoring of ESG issues, especially state laws aimed at protecting the oil and gas industry, can be expensive.

The 2021 Texas law prohibiting municipalities from dealing with banks that appeared to have pro-ESG policies led to the exit of five major municipal underwriters from the state, according to a study by Daniel Garrett of the University of Pennsylvania and Ivan Ivanov of the Federal Reserve.

They estimated that the interest costs for Texas municipalities on $32 billion in borrowing during the first eight months after the laws enactment were higher by as much as $532 million.

Conservative attacks on ESG arent new. The Trump administration took aim at the concept in 2020, when the Department of Labor tried to limit the ability of retirement account managers to offer account holders options for socially responsible or sustainable investments. Another Trump initiative aimed to make it harder for those managers to vote in favor of shareholder resolutions promoting ESG goals.

The Biden administration dropped those rules in March.

This is merely another iteration of the campaign against wokeness, which seems to be the core of what some Republican officeholders and aspirants have to offer voters.

A good example is Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis, who has made Walt Disney Co., one of his states largest employers, a target of his theatrical wrath because it deigned to criticize Floridas so-called Dont Say Gay law, which discourages teaching in public schools about gender issues.

Its easy to tar ESG as a left-wing, radical or fringe policy threatening sober, responsible corporate managements never mind that it has been spreading through Wall Street faster than almost any other investing concept in recent memory.

With ESG investing now accounting for more than $20 trillion in assets under management in the U.S. alone, according to Bloomberg Intelligence, or more than one-third of the total assets, ESG is now unmistakably mainstream.

For all that, ESG can be a squishy concept in practice. Deutsche Bank has come under investigation by German authorities and Goldman Sachs by the Securities and Exchange Commission for allegedly pasting ESG labels on investment funds that may not be especially rigorous about focusing on legitimate ESG companies, a practice sometimes described as greenwashing.

The SEC has proposed rules to promote consistent, comparable and reliable information for investors concerning funds and advisors incorporation of environmental, social, and governance factors. Among other rules, the agency says, funds focused on the consideration of environmental factors generally would be required to disclose the greenhouse gas emissions associated with their portfolio investments.

The investigations and the SEC proposals imply that investment firms are trying to serve the publics enthusiasm for socially responsible investing without doing the hard work of fashioning portfolios that meet the standard.

Defining what even qualifies as an ESG investment, however, isnt easy. The investment world is engaged in a vigorous debate over whether fossil fuel companies should be excluded from ESG portfolios entirely, or whether its proper to invest in some companies that are trying to transition from petroleum to renewables but havent completed the journey.

Environmental and social issues often go hand in hand. Musks complaint about S&Ps ESG index overlooked the reason Tesla was dropped from the roster: According to S&P, it was because of issues related to accusations of racial discrimination at Tesla and questions about the safety of Teslas Autopilot driver-assist features.

Exxon stayed on the list as an artifact of S&Ps complicated industry weighting process for the index, but didnt represent S&Ps judgment that the oil company was a beacon of environmental responsibility.

Not all fossil fuel companies respond to ESG initiatives with unalloyed hostility despite Pences assertion in his Houston speech that three directors elected to the board of Exxon Mobil on an ESG platform last year are now working to undermine the company from the inside.

In fact, Exxon Mobil has taken steps to placate ESG investors not least because the three directors elected last year in the campaign sponsored by the sustainable investment firm Engine No. 1 were reelected this year. In a one-year retrospective, Engine No. 1 reported that since the original election, Exxon has taken a multitude of actions to reduce its emissions footprint and has begun to lay the foundations for a viable low-carbon business strategy.

These initiatives can be viewed as undermining fossil fuel companies only if one believes that the oil and gas industry will be immune into the limitless future from the consequences of global warming and the developed worlds transition to alternative energy. As ESG investors understand, thats not the way to bet.

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Hiltzik: For Republicans, ESG is the new critical race theory - Los Angeles Times

Donald J. Trump, meanest of mean girls: He so doesn’t want to be our friend anymore – Salon

Testimony before the House Jan. 6 committee has often been cringeworthy, primarily because what Donald Trump was actively trying to do his steadfast intent, in the face of all evidence and most of the advice from the approximately sane people around him is abundantly clear to anyone who has an open mind.

But it gets especially excruciating when we have to hear accounts of Trump getting all hissy and hurt, his tantrums turning to vindictiveness, like an immature, petulant high school student. (Most likely a ninth-grader with emotional problems.)

None of that behavior is surprising, because Donald John Trump has always shown everyone around him and indeed everyone, period precisely who he is, a shameless man-boy who lies andcheats to get ahead and takes pleasure in bullying others, all the while bleating about how others treat him unfairly because they accurately point out that he's a liar, cheat and bully.

RELATED:Did "surprise witness" Cassidy Hutchinson save America from Trump's comeback?

He's a human Mbius strip of misdirection, misinformation and misappropriation of funds from his supporters.

We've always known that Trump was happy to encourage violence among his followers, so while it was shocking to hear about him reportedly throwing White House lunches and dinners against the wall or onto the floor, or about his henchmen's alleged efforts to influence witnesses, mob-style, it wasn't exactly surprising.

Everybody's talking about Cassidy Hutchinson's bombshell testimony but let's go back to the Jan. 5 session when Trump tried to browbeat Mike Pence.

In its sessions so far, the Jan. 6 committee has covered. While everyone and their uncle is talking about former White House aide Cassidy Hutchinson's bombshell testimony during the surprise hearing on June 28, let's not forget the session that focused on Trump's relationship with his fanboy vice president, whom we now know Trump was willing to see hanged in front of the Capitol by the armed mob he had summoned to Washington and whipped into a fury.

In meeting with Mike Pence and John Eastman the attorney full of imaginative schemes who later on just wondered about that pardon on Jan. 5, 2021, the eve of You Know What, Trump reportedly pressed the veep to do his bidding in his usual mature manner: "You can either go down in history as a patriot, or you can go down in history as a pussy." (We don't know whether any of the White House china wound up on the floor during this encounter.)

When Pence correctly responded that he had no constitutional authority to stop or reject the certification of the electoral votes, according to the account in "Peril," by Bob Woodward and Robert Costa, Trump tried to appeal to some untapped adolescent side within the pious Hoosier, asking him: "But wouldn't it almost be cool to have that power?"

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While it's a bit of a stretch to call Mike Pence a hero, his backbone had apparently been stiffened by conversations with former Vice President Dan Quayle and retired federal judge J. Michael Luttig (man of exceedingly slow answers), and he continued to resist. That was when Trump pulled out his big guns, threatening Pence with the horror of taking away his friendship:

When Pence did not budge, Trump turned on him.

"No, no, no! Trump shouted, according to the authors. "You don't understand, Mike. You can do this. I don't want to be your friend anymore if you don't do this."

One is reminded of the queen bee character played by Rachel McAdams in Tina Fey's spot-on 2004 film "Mean Girls." She wouldn't have been so pathetically direct about it, but manipulating others by leveraging her "friendship" was certainly how she rolled.

But that wasn't the final card pulled by Mean Girl Trump in the climactic Pence meeting. When the vice president refused to play along with Trump's plot to subvert the Constitution and undo the outcome of a legitimate election, Trump called on his public, via social media and speeches and anything else he could think of, to "tell on" Pence and ramp up the pressure for him to "do the right thing." What's more, he kept that up well after he had to know that Pence was in real physical danger at the Capitol.

People inside the White House, including the former president's daughter Ivanka, have testified that Trump phoned Pence on the morning of the insurrection and during a final heated conversation called him a "wimp" and a "pussy."

Trump's deepest fear, through all this, was that he might wind up being thought of as a loser. Asreported by the New York Times, the day before Trump and his many co-conspirators in the West Wing, in the "war room" at the Willard hotel and in the Capitol itself kicked off the insurrection for real, he admitted as much to people around him:

The president has told several people privately that he would rather lose with people thinking it was stolen from him than that he simply lost, according to people familiar with his remarks.

That is so, so high school. And there it is again, the knowledge that what he was doing was based on a lie (in case "Just say the election was corrupt and leave the rest to me and the Republican congressmen" wasn't enough for you). Trump always planned to say the 2020 election was stolen if he didn't win. He started undermining the process in the eyes of his supporters back in the 2016 primaries and then when he lost the popular vote to Hillary Clinton by nearly 3 million.

As we have learned from the committee hearings, Trump also understood that his Big Lie about election fraud presented him another opportunity for grift. He reportedly brought in some $250 million from his supporters for a nonexistent election defense fund (which was supposed to investigate nonexistent election fraud), emailing his small-dollar donors dozens of times a day.

People of my generation are always hoping that members of the younger generation will step up and save us from ourselves. Cassidy Hutchinson, a well-spoken 25-year-old, did just that. It was remarkably brave of her to do the right thing, to tell the truth about what she saw and heard in the mob social club of the Trump White House. (It's also reasonable to ask what she thought she was doing there in the first place.)

The ultimate lesson of these hearings so far is clear: The former president of the United States still thinks it might be "cool" to destroy democracy, and if you don't want to go along with that he definitely won't be your friend anymore and might just encourage his followers to string you up.

As Salon columnist and longtime White House correspondent Brian Karem noted recently, if our democracy is to survive, this dangerous mean girl must finally face the consequences of his actions. Seeing Trump and his enablers prosecuted would only be a first step toward our national recovery, but a vitally important one. It might make sure that future presidents don't emulate his example and remind them that "being our friend" isn't actually part of the job.

Read more on our 45th president and the Jan. 6 committee:

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Donald J. Trump, meanest of mean girls: He so doesn't want to be our friend anymore - Salon

The five Republicans who could challenge Trump in 2024 – The Hill

Former President Trump has hinted repeatedly that hes weighing another bid for the White House in 2024.

And while hes made clear that, if he does so, the nomination should be his for the taking, he could still face some competition. A number of Republicans have begun maneuvering toward presidential campaigns of their own, some more overtly than others.

Of course, theres a political risk that comes with challenging Trump. But that doesnt appear to be deterring some prospective candidates.

Here are the five Republicans who could challenge Trump for the partys 2024 presidential nod.

Ron DeSantis

Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis has brushed off suggestions that he will mount a presidential campaign in 2024, saying that his No. 1 priority is winning a second term in the governors mansion.

But he also hasnt explicitly ruled out the possibility, and unlike several other prospective GOP presidential contenders, he hasnt committed to forgoing a White House bid if Trump launches a comeback campaign.

And with his clout among Republicans on the rise, its possible that, if DeSantis ultimately decides to run in 2024, he may not be deterred by the former president.

Early polling shows him as the heavy favorite for the Republican presidential nomination if Trump doesnt run again. There are even a few recent surveys that show him topping Trump in a hypothetical primary match-up.

DeSantiss growing momentum and influence within the GOP suggests that he may ultimately have a path to the nomination, with or without Trump in the race, especially given the fact that he still has plenty of room to grow his name ID among Republicans nationally.

Mike Pence

Despite running afoul of Trump early last year when he rebuffed the former presidents efforts to overturn the results of the 2020 election, former Vice President Mike Pence has begun more aggressively positioning himself for a potential White House bid in recent months.

Hes given a series of high-profile speeches, traveled to crucial early presidential primary and caucus states and even made a trip to the Ukraine-Poland border amid Russias ongoing invasion.

Pence is also among a small group of Republicans considering a White House run, regardless of what Trump decides to do in 2024.

While he has isolated parts of Trumps conservative voter base with his insistence that he had no right to overturn the results of the 2020 election, Pence has cast himself as a successor to the former presidents policy legacy. Hes touted his work with Trump, while also fashioning himself as a protector of democratic institutions in the face of efforts to tear them down.

All that is to say that Pence might just be willing to take his chances in a potential 2024 match-up against his former boss.

Mike Pompeo

Former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo earned a reputation as one of Trumps most loyal advisers and Cabinet members during his four years in the White House.

But hes since taken steps away from the former president, all the while seeking to boost his post-administration political profile.

Not long after leaving the State Department, Pompeo created a political action committee dubbed Champion American Values PAC or CAVPAC and has actively endorsed in midterm races across the country, at times putting himself at odds with Trump.

In the GOP Senate primary in Pennsylvania, for instance, Pompeo backed former hedge fund CEO David McCormick over Trumps pick for the nomination, celebrity physician Mehmet Oz. Pompeo even held a press briefing ahead of the primary in which he raised concerns about Ozs ties to Turkey.

The former secretary of State has also hinted that his plans for 2024 arent contingent on what Trump does, tellingFox News in an interviewthat any decision about his political future will be his and his alone.

The Pompeos have always used the simple fact of do you believe this is the moment where you think you can best serve America, this is the place you can have the most impact, Pompeo said. That will be how we make our decision in the end.

Larry Hogan

Maryland Gov. Larry Hogan has long been one of Trumps most prominent Republican critics, so the idea of him challenging the former president for the 2024 GOP nomination isnt exactly surprising.

A Republican governor of a blue state, Hogan has carved out a reputation for himself as a more traditional conservative in the mold of someone like former President Reagan.

Hes warned repeatedly that a 2024 Trump candidacy could cost the GOP the White House once again and has called on the party to look toward its future rather than linger on Trumps 2020 loss.

Hogan is term-limited and isnt seeking reelection this year. And while that frees him up to plot his next political steps, it also comes with another risk: remaining in the spotlight after he officially exits public office.

Still, hes not exactly playing coy with the possibility of a 2024 run. In a Februaryappearance on CNN, Hogan said that hes certainly going to take a look at a White House bid once he leaves office next January.

Ted Cruz

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) has never really been shy about his political ambitions. After all, he has already run for president once, finishing second to Trump in the 2016 Republican presidential primary.

Despite a bitter nominating contest between the two men six years ago, Cruz emerged as an ardent supporter of the former president during his time in the White House. But the Texas senator has also shown a willingness to break with Trump, especially when it comes to whom he endorses.

In the Ohio GOP Senate primary, for instance, Cruz was vocal in his support for former state Treasurer Josh Mandel, while Trump backed author and venture capitalist J.D. Vance. Vance ultimately won the nomination.

And Cruz has also been more open than most about his willingness to launch another bid for the White House. Asked in a Decemberinterview with the conservative news outlet The Truth Gazettewhether he would consider another presidential campaign, Cruz responded: Absolutely. In a heartbeat.

Theres a reason historically that the runner-up is almost always the next nominee, Cruz said, referring to his second-place primary finish in 2016. And thats been true going back to Nixon or Reagan or McCain or Romney that has played out repeatedly. You come in with just an enormous base of support.

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The five Republicans who could challenge Trump in 2024 - The Hill

Jan. 6 Witness Anthony Ornato Is at the Center of a Battle Over Credibility – The New York Times

Anthony M. Ornato had left his role as the Secret Service agent in charge of President Donald J. Trumps protective detail in late 2019 when the culture of internal strife that Mr. Trump fostered throughout his term left the presidents top advisers frantically searching for a candidate to fill a key role: deputy White House chief of staff for operations.

The title does not fully capture the significance of the job, which entails ensuring the continuity of government and overseeing the logistics of the presidents movements outside the White House, security and the military office. Intent on ensuring it went to someone qualified and with few options available, the person leaving the role, Dan Walsh, and Lindsay Reynolds, the chief of staff to Melania Trump, the first lady, quickly settled on Mr. Ornato, who was well known to Mr. Trump.

Mr. Ornato did not want the job, according to three former White House officials. By that point he was happily working at Secret Service headquarters. Like many agents, he had served previous administrations across party lines, first protecting President George W. Bushs daughter Barbara and later working on President Barack Obamas detail. And in any case, it would be highly unusual for an official from an avowedly apolitical agency to take a high-ranking job inside the White House.

But when Mr. Trump called to tell him he was putting him in the job, he believed he had no choice but to take it, according to those officials. For the remainder of Mr. Trumps presidency, Mr. Ornato was at the heart of the West Wing, occupying an office steps down the hall from the Oval Office and adjacent to the office of Jared Kushner, the presidents son-in-law and senior adviser.

Now, Mr. Ornato is at the center of a dispute over events during the riot at the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021. He is both a witness to key developments and a figure in what is either a legitimate battle over credibility or, in the view of some critics, an attempt to muddy the devastating account of the actions of Mr. Trump and his aides provided to the House Jan. 6 committee this week by Cassidy Hutchinson, another former White House aide.

In her public testimony, Ms. Hutchinson said she learned from Mr. Ornato of a stunning scene in the back of the presidential vehicle on Jan. 6, soon after a speech by Mr. Trump at the Ellipse outside the White House ended.

She testified that Mr. Ornato told her that Mr. Trump tried to force the Secret Service to drive him to the Capitol to join his supporters. In her recounting, Mr. Ornato said Mr. Trump tried to grab the steering wheel of the armored vehicle.

Ms. Hutchinson also said Mr. Ornato told her the president lunged at his lead Secret Service agent, Robert Engel. Mr. Engel, Ms. Hutchinson testified, was present as Mr. Ornato related the story to her and did not correct Mr. Ornatos account.

Secret Service officials have said Mr. Ornato, Mr. Engel and the driver of the vehicle are prepared to testify that such an incident did not happen. (The committee already had interviewed Mr. Ornato and Mr. Engel, before Ms. Hutchinsons appearance this week.)

The officials do not dispute that Mr. Trump angrily demanded to be taken to the Capitol. On the day of the riot, Trump administration officials told The New York Times that the president was in a fury while he was at the rally.

One Secret Service official, asking that his name not be used to describe the potential testimony, acknowledged a conversation took place with Ms. Hutchinson but said it played out differently than she described.

Officials with the Jan. 6 committee have sought to bolster Ms. Hutchinsons credibility, saying they found inconsistencies in Mr. Ornatos testimony, although they did not release the transcripts in question. A former colleague, Alyssa Farah Griffin, accused him on Twitter of lying about an encounter they had during the 2020 protests in Lafayette Square outside the White House. Representative Adam Kinzinger, Republican of Illinois and a member of the committee, wrote on the social media site, There seems to be a major thread here Tony Ornato likes to lie.

But Keith Kellogg, the former national security adviser to Vice President Mike Pence, vouched for Mr. Ornato publicly, as did other former officials.

I think the guys a straight shooter, said John F. Kelly, the former White House chief of staff who has publicly broken with Mr. Trump, and who worked with Mr. Ornato when he was the special agent in charge of Mr. Trumps detail. There was never a second thought in my mind that, wherever we went, the work the Secret Service needed to do was done and done really well.

A former senior official in the Trump administration recalled Mr. Trump demanding to be allowed to attend a major public event with a days notice, and Mr. Ornato bluntly informing him that such a move was not possible.

In the first few years of the Trump presidency, two former senior officials said, Mr. Ornato would periodically flag for the chief of staff or one of his trusted aides what was known as limo talk, the kind of directives or pronouncements that Mr. Trump would make that he either expected people to act on or which Mr. Ornato thought the chief should be aware of.

As the current assistant director of the Office of Training at the Secret Service, Mr. Ornato is based at Secret Service headquarters, although those close to the agency said he often made trips to the training facility in rural Maryland to speak with prospective agents. He has held various leadership positions in the agency, including in the New York field office.

While there, he was responsible for all protective operations, including the prominent assignment of ensuring officials were safe at the U.N. General Assembly.

A native of a town outside New Haven, Conn., Mr. Ornatos family owned a tavern in the city that was a generational haunt for local police officers and firefighters. He worked in the New Haven Secret Service office in 2000 as Mr. Bush was running for president. When Mr. Bush won, Mr. Ornato joined his daughters protective detail. He stayed on under Mr. Obama, and was promoted a handful of times.

People who worked with Mr. Ornato in the Trump White House said they had never seen him talking about his political opinions, even when the former president sought his views, as Mr. Trump was prone to do with almost everyone around him.

But some officials were uncomfortable with the decision to name a member of the Secret Service, which has long tried to maintain the image of nonpartisanship, to deputy chief of staff of operations at the White House.

Never, ever heard of it, said Rand Beers, a former acting secretary of homeland security in the Obama administration. Even though the Secret Service detailees can be involved in some pretty sensitive things, pretty embarrassing things, they preserve their image in that people dont generally think of them as being political by their silence.

All I can say, he said, is that is extraordinarily unusual.

Luke Broadwater contributed reporting.

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Jan. 6 Witness Anthony Ornato Is at the Center of a Battle Over Credibility - The New York Times

Reminder: All Women Required To Report To Mike Pence To Receive Standard-Issue Handmaid Outfit By 5 PM Today – The Babylon Bee

PUBLIC NOTICE: All women are required to report to Mike Pence to receive their standard-issue handmaid outfits by 5:00 PM EST today. Any woman who is not in line by 5:00 PM EST will be rounded up by Pence's Soldiers of the Patriarchy and transported to one of the country's 38 Handmaid Reeducation Hovels via cattle car.

This public notice has been issued following the U.S. Supreme Court ruling Roe v. Wade unconstitutional, thus initiating Mike Pence's surreptitious plan to turn the United States into a nation run by Christian zealots who want lots of handmaids and babies.

Items women are allowed to bring:

-Female reproductive organs

-Birthing hips

-Functioning uterus

-Silence

-Fruit snacks

Items women are not allowed to bring:

-Attitude

-Personality

-Jewelry/makeup

-Pepsi

Upon receipt of standard-issue handmaid outfits, women are stripped of their right to vote, protest, have opinions, gossip, stare enviously at other women's outfits, or choose dinner locations.

Women with blue hair will be sent to the oil fields.

Satan held a press conference today responding to the big loss of Roe v. Wade. He's doing his best to keep his chin up.

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Reminder: All Women Required To Report To Mike Pence To Receive Standard-Issue Handmaid Outfit By 5 PM Today - The Babylon Bee