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Tommy Sotomayor Says: Just Say NO To Hair Hats! | New Growth …
Tommy TJ Sotomayor, aka Mr. Controversy, is a comedian, online radio show host of Your World, My Views, and documentary film producer of an upcoming film entitled A Fatherless America. Mr. Sotomayor is known for his strong opinions on a variety of topics including African-American women who wear hair weave. We learned about Mr. Sotomayor after our readers shared his controversial hair-relatedvideos in online broadcasts. After our team watched several of Sotomayors controversial videos, we felt compelled to reach out to him for an in depth interview to fully understand his point of view. Below is my interview with Tommy Sotomayor about his views on black women and their hair choices.
Phillips: Please share your views on African-American women who wear hair weave?
Sotomayor: I think my views on black women who wear hair weave are misunderstood. I think there is an assumption that I hate black women who wear weave, but thats not my issue with them. I hate their attitude! The black women who wear weave or hair hats as I prefer to call them think that they are super human because of their hair hats. There are lots of black women who are overweight, who have no job, and whos lives are in a state of crisis but their high-priced hair hats are supposed to fix all of their problems.
In my opinion, hair is supposed to be a womans crown, and the black queen is supposed to behave in a royal way. The queens hair isnt supposed to look like the peasants or the servants hair. My questions to all of the black women who wear those horrible hair hats: why are you ashamed of your hair? Why are you putting another persons DNA (who youve never met before) on your scalp? Black women spend $10 billion on their hair, but not even half of that on educating their children. I say they are spending $10 billion to look foolish by wearing these crazy looking hair hats!
The same black women who regularly attend church and love to say that God dont make no mistakes are the same ones who wear those horrible hair hats! Are they saying that God made a mistake on their hair so they have to fix it by purchasing a hair hat? Ive heard lots of excuses for why they need their hair hats! They wear their hair hats because its a protective hair style. In reality, hair hats damage their hair.
Most black women look like mannequins with their high priced hair hats, fake eye lashes, and un-ladylike tattoos. The truth is that most black women are trying to out-white white women. You cant complain about white women stealing all of your men when you are trying to look like her! If a black man wants a white woman, he isnt going to get an American Euro-black or Negropean woman pretending to be a white woman.
Phillips: Do Naturalistas have higher self-esteem than women who wear weaves?
Sotomayor: Okay Rashad, here is where Im going to get a lot of black women mad at me. But this wont be the first time. At first, I thought Naturalistas had higher self-esteem but later I learned that many of the natural women are members of the Natural Hair Nazis, people who couldnt afford hair weave and/or werent that attractive. The best way I can describe the Natural Hair Nazis is that they are like the young Christian women who couldnt fit in during high school, so they joined the church. The church was their haven and they used it to pick on the other kids that they secretly wanted to be like. Well, many of the Natural Hair Nazis were unattractive when they had a relaxer and decided to go natural to attack the attractive women who have relaxers.
Heres my problem with the Natural Hair Nazis. You dont go natural, you are born natural. Also, I have an issue with most of the images on social media of women with natural hair. Most of them are mixed chicks. The Natural Hair Nazis love the mixed chicks with natural hair.
I saw the August 2013 cover of your magazine and that looked like a mixed chick on the cover. I rarely see dark-skinned women with natural hair on the cover of magazines or heavily promoted on social media. If she is light skinned, its all about her pretty face but if she is dark-skinned, the focus is on her bangin body. Its still that situation where if you are light skinned you have good hair but if you are dark skinned you are happy to be nappy. I will say that some natural black women do have higher self-esteem because they dont hide their hair as opposed to the hair hat wearers who base their self-esteem on somebody elses hair.
Phillips: Why do you have an issue with African-American women who wear hair weave, but not with white women who wear hair weave?
Sotomayor: White women dont walk around with black womens hair in their head. If they did we would say that they were racist or that they were making fun of black womens hair. Black women who wear hair hats are proud to walk around with white womens hair, or, let me get it correct before I get blasted on YouTube black women are proud to wear Malaysian, Brazilian, and Indian womens hair. Im not saying all of this to tear down black women; I want black women to look as natural as possible. If a black man wore a Ted Coppell looking wig or hair piece, people would laugh and clown that dude. Why dont people laugh at black women who wear hair hats? It used to be a point in time (in the 80s and 90s) when men would talk trash and wouldnt even date women who wore wigs or weaves. But now we arent supposed to say anything.
Getting back on track, I dont focus on white womens hair because Im not raising a white child and I dont live in white culture. Im raising a little black girl. Me focusing on white womens hair would be like a Jewish person focusing on Christianity it just doesnt make sense.
Phillips: Do you have any closing comments?
Sotomayor: I just want black women to be honest and really think about what I am saying: Who do you think a black man would want to deal with? A woman who cuts her cuts and styles her hair every 3 months or a woman who spend thousands of dollars annually on hair maintenance? After the black woman spends thousands of dollars on her hair, you cant do anything with her that might mess up her hair like go swimming or have sex in the shower. If you do, she has to wear this ugly plastic cap or put a grocery bag on her hair. A lot of the time, black women expect men to chip in with paying for their high-priced hair, new hair dos, and hair products, but at the same time we cant have fun or spontaneous sex because of your hair. This just doesnt make any sense. I know Im going to take heat for almost everything I said in this interview but somebody has to tell the truth.
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This statement was placed on a loop and played a few times. It was taken from a video that taken place right after the Milwaukee riots. It was the sister of the deceased Black man who was killed by the police there. She was stating this because she was upset that the beauty supply was burned down. She also expressed concern for other businesses that were burned down too, but that part was left out of the video. I guess it didnt fit the narrative that Mr. Sotomayor was trying to make.
Notice how he uses the images of Black women that are negative. In this video thumbnail, we dont know why this womans hair is the way that it is, but anything to continue to embarrass Black women.
Not sure why Black women are such a target of his videos nor do I care to discuss that. I want to discuss the statements that he made in this particular video and why I find them incredibly offensive and wrong.
He states that it should be a Crime to procreate with a black woman because she wears weave and must be ashamed of her own hair. Its absolutely ridiculous. He had video of Black women after Hurricane Katrina going through sewer water to get weave. So because some ignorant people decided to do that, is it representative of all Black women? Does that represent all Black women that wear weave? Just because THOSE women decided to make that move?
There is also this myth that Black women HAVE to wear weave. Again, nonsense. Its not a necessity. Its a WANT. I dont have to wear weaves, but I love wearing them just as much as I love shoes and accessories. Its not something that I need. To be framed in that manner is just dishonest. There are millions of Black women that have never worn a weave in their life. My mother is one of those women. She does not like them. My niece is another. There are tons that wont let a weave near them, so why are they lumped in with every Black woman that chooses to wear them?
All Black women should not be lumped together just because SOME Black women jumped in a sewer to get some weave. It doesnt show the desperation of all Black women to get weave. He merely showed THESE WOMEN and the desperation to get weave.
With the quality of weaves improving over the years, it is an expensive commodity. He said himself its a million dollar business. Well, its actually a billion dollar business. Many people would wade through sewer water to retrieve a billion dollars if it were under there. These Black women arent any different.
Then he makes fun of the fact that Black women dont love their hair. Why would they love it if all they wanted to do was cover it up? He doesnt get the irony of his own statement. OF COURSE THEY LOVE THEIR HAIR. THATS WHY THEY ARE COVERING IT UP. If I want to protect my own hair, then of course I must love it. Its not an excuse, it is the truth. Protective styles are important to Black hair. Constant styling breaks it off. Mr. Sotomayor should know this. Many Black women have hair down their backs, thanks to protective styling. Im one of those women. My daughter is as well. Many Black women do this. He made some ridiculous analogy about protecting another girl that made no sense, whatsoever. The proof is in the pudding. He can put up the same tired pictures of Black women with no hair. But the fact of the matter is that there are many more that have long beautiful hair. Thanks to the protective styling that Black women have used to make sure their tresses stay beautiful.
Why is this? As a natural and a weave wearer, the difference is obvious. I got ten times the attention when I wore my long weave versus sporting an afro puff. Black men didnt want to talk to me then. Curiously enough, WHITE MEN were attracted to me more when I wore my natural hair. My ASIAN fiancee loves my natural hair. Well since hes a real man, he loves me regardless. He doesnt fuss about my hair. He knows that I have long and beautiful hair underneath my weaves. As long as Im healthy, take great care of him, love him, and enjoy each other, thats all that matters. Men that care about looks and superficial things like hair weaves, STAY AWAY FROM THEM!!
What he speaks is nonsense. Protecting your hair with a weave is something that all people have done since its invention. People dont wear wigs and weaves because they hate something about themselves. In order to make that claim about Black women, it would have to be made about anyone who wears them, since they were not invented exclusively for Black women. Its complete and utter nonsense.
For the millions of Black women that dont wear weaves, I guess youre being punished for those that do. For the millions of Black women who wear them and keep them clean, youre being punished for the minority that dont. For the millions of Black women that have pride in themselves, youre being put in a category that you dont belong in.
Hatred. It manifests in so many different ways. Ive dated Black men who had negative things to say about Black women as a whole. Youre not like them, they would say. These were men with Black mothers and sisters, but somehow these women were exempt from such caricatures.
Some dark-skinned Black men would be on the school yard making fun of me for having the same features that they had. They never really saw the irony of what they were doing. Why? Perhaps its a bit uncomfortable to really show the world that youre comfortable in your skin. Since they were not, they had to pick on me. When there wasnt much difference there.
Any man that can put down a woman of his own race is a person that hates himself. How can he love himself?? How can he love anyone else? I hate Black hoes and Bitches! He screams in his videos to the delight of his White and Black male fans. This nonsense is applauded by some but its really quizzical behavior on behalf of his Black fans. To racist Whites, hes doing nothing but confirming the worst of stereotypes. What he fails to realize that in doing so, when they pick apart his daughter, his sister, or his mother, they wont stop and say, Oh well thats Tommys family so they are okay. No. They will see a Black Hoe to have sex with and thats all. When they see his daughter, theyll try to sleep with her and then leave her.
Oh the contradictions....
Watching his channel, youd think Black women were the spawns of Satan. Thats what ignorance does. When you dont think for yourself, you have people like this to think for you. He has a ton of fans as well. This contributes to poisonous thinking that is out there in droves, especially during this election cycle. This poison is passed onto our children who have Black mothers but dont see their beauty. He judges their value on the length of her hair or how light her skin is. They will judge the value of Black women on everything but her character. Its a luxury that is not afforded to Black women often. While other women are looked to for their beauty, Black women are expected to be exotic in bed and thats it. Thats all she is worth to this Black man.
To Black women that had to be subjected to this video, and all of the other abuse that we get on a daily basis, keep your head up. You are beautiful. Every single one of you. If some of you think that you need weave to look beautiful, you dont need someone telling you that youre only good to fuck. You need someone to show you differently, thats all. You need someone to tell you that its okay. Not tear you down.
Wearing weaves over the past twenty years was pretty eye-opening for me. I wore short Halle Berry cuts until one day I wanted to try a bob. I put a weave in my hair and loved the style. Then I wore it all long and my BLACK boyfriend loved it so much, he took me right there! When I went outside, the reaction I received increased. I even started modeling. What lesson did that teach me? However, I wasnt taking care of my hair. I had to learn how to do that. When I did that, my hair flourished. It grew. And what do I do now? Braid it up and put a wig on! Why? Because with my lifestyle, I dont go many places so there is no need to wear and style my hair daily. So its braided and when I go out, I put a nice wig over it. Theres no shame. Because if there was, then why would I care about protecting it? I could just shave it all off (on chemo anyway) and wear a nice expensive lacefront wig! I would not want to throw my hubbys money away, as Mr. Sotomayor states in his video. As if Black women dont spend their OWN money for their hair, but thats another story that we wont even address. Yet.
Black hair grows just like White hair. Its retaining length that we have a hard time with, thats all. Because we know our hair is tough and fragile at the same time, protective styling is the way to go.
I love White folks, he said at the end of his video.
We know.
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