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As a social justice activist , trauma is an ever-present factor in my work. In fact, witnessing or experiencing a traumatic event is often the spark that ignites people to take action in the first place. It was for me. And as you can imagine, steeping yourself in pain to effect change can get exhausting. To combat this, theres a practice within the activist community known as step up, step back, which refers to activists and organizers taking turns being on the front lines of an initiative versus playing a more supportive role. This practice is necessary for the sustainability of movementsand for the sake of the people involved.

This past weekend I was in step-back mode, watching events unfold in Charlottesville, Virginia, where a white supremacist rally had sprung up in response to the scheduled removal of a Confederate statue. After being in conversation with clergy who were organizing a demonstration to counter the white supremacists, I watched in real-time as the religious leaders joined arms and marched into danger, standing firmly in the spirit of nonviolence and truth. I felt inspired but also deeply concerned for their safety as news began emerging of violent clashes and a delayed police response.

Apart from sending my friends encouraging words, the most I could do was use my platform to amplify what was happening and why it was significant. I committed myself to that role, using both social and traditional media outlets to help get the word out.

As 8 p.m. approached on Saturday, I sent out a final tweet for the day, announcing it was time for me to practice what I preach and take some time for self-care in a black joy space.

I'm an introvert, so I often enjoy time in quiet and seclusion, but I also find joy and healing in being around friends and loved ones. In either instance, I practice mindfulness being fully present in the momentas a way of centering myself and clearing my head.

I already had plans to attend a gathering of local artists on Saturday night, but after a day focused on the traumatic events unfolding in Charlottesville, it became even more important for me to be intentional about attending.

I havent always been so disciplined about self-careI have a tendency to go, go, go until I burn out. In times past, I likely wouldve skipped the artists' gathering and continued to tweet while following the breaking news beat by beat. Balancing activism with self-care didn't come naturally to me at first. But since committing myself to fighting for social justice a few years ago, it's something I've developed out of necessity.

Trayvon Martin's murder in February 2012 and the subsequent acquittal of his killer, George Zimmerman, were deeply traumatic for me. As Zimmerman was acquitted in July 2013, North Carolina was waging an attack on voting rights after a U.S. Supreme Court ruling struck down key parts of the Voting Rights Act of 1965. Although Id always been socially conscious and politically active, this combination of events convinced me of how easily and quickly my rights could be taken away. I had to do more to ensure that didnt happen.

I volunteered to be arrested during a voting rights sit-in at the North Carolina statehouse and shortly thereafter traveled with a group of youth activists from North Carolina to Florida to join the Dream Defenders. They were occupying the statehouse in Florida in protest of the stand-your-ground laws that had permitted Trayvon Martins murderer to walk free. Over the next two years, I committed myself to protesting in the streets and raising awareness around the continuing problems of systemic racism in America. I organized many protests and meetings in my hometown of Charlotte, North Carolina, as I gradually transitioned into the role of becoming a community organizer.

Thats the work I was engaged in when, in June 2015, a white supremacist walked into Mother Emmanuel AME Church in Charleston, South Carolina, and murdered nine black parishioners during a prayer meeting. My decision to participate in lowering the Confederate flag at South Carolinas statehouse was a response to this trauma, along with many historical traumas as well: the four little girls killed in the 1963 bombing of the 16th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama, the enslavement of my ancestors in South Carolina, the assassinations of so many civil rights activists over the years.

In preparing to scale the flagpole, I spent a lot of time in contemplative prayer, during which I made peace with the danger I was facing and the possibility of my own death . When that didnt happen and the flag removal was successful, I faced another scenario of circumstances I hadnt spent as much time preparing for.

I had to adjust to having a national platform for my advocacy. I spent much of that year traveling the nation and speaking at various colleges and universities about the legacy of slavery in America and the issues confronting our society.

There was one question audience members asked most frequently regardless of where I spoke: What do you do for self-care? This question was most often posed by young black women, indicating to me a particular need for black women to emphasize self-care and to make sure I was practicing self-care as well.

Images and conversations depicting me as a black female superhero are amazing and empowering, but they also remind me that black women are often called upon to demonstrate superhuman strength, usually to the detriment of our health and well-being . We're living in a society that was built upon the enslavement and dehumanization of black people, a society that targets black women in specific and heinous ways. Being intentional about caring for ourselves and each other and carving out moments and spaces for joy is itself a radical form of resilience and resistance.

I'm still engaged in both leading and supporting various efforts and initiatives in the fight for social justice. However, Ive finally learned to pause and step away when I need to, unplugging from the work and plugging into my immediate surroundings, finding moments of stillness and peace. The movement began before I arrived, and I can be certain it will still be here when I return.

Bree Newsome is an artist who drew national attention in 2015 when she climbed the flagpole in front of the South Carolina Capitol building and lowered the Confederate battle flag following the white supremacist terrorist attack at Mother Emanuel AME in Charleston.

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Charlottesville Reinforced That Self-Care Is an Essential Part of My Activism - SELF