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I am a black man in America. I use my art to speak outJoshua Rashaad McFadden, Minneapolis

The first time I experienced racism I was about ten. Someone called me the N-word in gym class, but I was the one who was reprimanded: they called my parents as if I had provoked him to call me that. My parents were upset and made sure I knew that I was not that word. That should not have been the way teachers adults handled that situation.

In adulthood I began to notice racism more and more. I was a senior in college in 2012 when Trayvon Martin was killed. He was walking through a gated community when he was shot by George Zimmerman, a neighbourhood-watch volunteer. When Zimmerman was acquitted it was the first time I really saw my generation protest and that sparked the Black Lives Matter movement.

Many of the young people protesting now were only ten years old then. They grew up within the Black Lives Matter movement and they see it very differently from how I do. I think they feel more empowered, theyre less afraid to participate.

I live in Rochester, New York, but when I saw what was happening in Minneapolis I decided to drive there straight away. I essentially drove overnight.

When I got there, everywhere I went the atmosphere was one of sadness. Everybody seemed traumatised. There were pockets of the city that were burned down, particularly around Lake Street. It was gassy, smoky. There was debris and people were running. It looked like a war zone. Things were sparking, exploding, crumbling right in front of your eyes. And there were huge military trucks coming down the street.

I am a black male in America. I deal with the same issues being perceived as a threat, or who knows what. In these situations, trying to document the protests, it always comes down to one question: how do the police see me? A white photographer offered for me to join her, saying, if you come with me, theyre less likely to shoot. So I stuck with her for the night. Do I see myself as a photographer, an activist or a participant? Im all of those things. Its who I am. But Im also an artist, and my art is what I use to speak out.

On Sunday the police and national guard started to push back more. I saw protesters being shot with rubber bullets. The police were aiming guns and throwing tear-gas bombs. Some people tried to extinguish the tear-gas canisters using traffic cones. The gas goes into your mouth and your nose and your eyes. It burned my face, it was stinging, I couldnt breathe. All my skin, my whole body was burning. It pretty much took me out for the night.

If I had fear, I wouldnt be here. It is emotionally taxing. I saw a kid who was about 16, who was out at a protest by himself at two in the morning. People were wondering, why are you here, where are your parents? He said his mother passed away, he doesnt have any parents and he felt like he needed to be there. Because, of course, he identified. Just seeing the pain, it sticks with you. Theres not really much I could do about it. I just keep moving forward, I just know that the work has to be done.

Joshua Rashaad McFadden is from Rochester, New York, where he teaches photography at the Rochester Institute of Technology.

Excerpt from:
Portraits of protest in America | 1843 - The Economist 1843