Mediaboss Marketing

fidorover 21 hours ago

*_Thanksgiving Dinner November 23, 2017 4.33 pm_*HOST: Attention, everyone. I just wanted to extend a big hello to all our friends and relatives. Welcome to our humble home. _(everyone cheers)_ First of all, so as not to repeat the disaster that _was_ last Thanksgiving, weve decided to put the Trump supporters down the basement. And while that may not _sound_ great, there are three big-screen TVs blasting Fox News down there and you can wear your MAGA hats at the dinner table so theres that. Ooh, and if we could keep the accidental shootings amongst you Trump folks down to two this year, thatd be fantastic.

Now, as for the rest of us those who still believe two plus two equals four well be eating in the formal dining room, having intelligent conversation, and using things like utensils and facts. _(Voice in Crowd: Fake news!)_

Also, to the Alex Jones fans among us before you even ask me the answer is yes: this dinner is not actually happening and is all a conspiracy cooked up by demon-spawn Hillary Clinton and funded by billionaire George Soros. So congrats you called it. Also, once Ive wrapped up the leftovers, you Alex Jones fans can help yourselves to all the tinfoil left on the roll. _(Uncle Marty: Woohoo)_

Oh, and will the person with the giant Confederate flag painted on their 2002 Kia Spectra please move your car. Youre parked in front of a fire hydrant or as the Alex Jones fans call them, Deep State Spy Spigots. _(Uncle Marty: Damn right they are!!)_ Anyway, itd be great if you could park your General Lee a little further down the street ya know, on the far right.

And lastly, as a side note, my proudly bigoted second cousin Harlan who last year wore the Jews Will Not Replace Us jacket has been replaced this year by my long-time accountant, Irv Fishman. Great to have you here, Irv, and thanks for the Matzah balls.

Anyhoo, welcome again, thanks for joining us, and Happy Thanksgiving to all!! _(everyone cheers)_

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Trump Even Made Pardoning Turkeys About Obama - Late Night Feud